9 weeks.

Dear bean in my belly,

Yesterday I turned nine weeks pregnant and you turned seven weeks old. You are the size of a grape. All your essential body parts are accounted for, although they will need to ripen up quite a bit yet. (That's what the next 6 months, 3 weeks are for.) You have external sex organs, but we won't be able to see them for another few months. So your whether you are a little girl bean or a little boy bean remains shrouded in mystery. Your little face is starting to take shape: you have eyes underneath eyelids that are fused shut, you have tiny earlobes (my favorite part!), and your mouth, nose, and nostrils are more distinct. But the best news yet: your embryonic tail is completely gone! Shane will be so happy! (He was not a fan of the tail.)

This week was a bit easier than last. A bit -- a few bad days, a few good days, a few bad days instead of seven bad days. This weekend Shane and I will be working at the Viva el Mariachi! Festival, and the preparations already have me exhausted. I don't have as much responsibility as past years, but right now, any responsibility feels like too much responsibility. I am inexpressibly grateful that Shane will be there throughout the weekend to carry me along, figuratively and perhaps literally. It wouldn't happen otherwise, and the workshops would have to organize themselves.

This week my body began to let me know that perhaps something is going on inside of it. My breasts have not yet quadrupled in size, but they are definitely not the breasts of 9 weeks ago. This Sunday I wore a favorite skirt of mine, and I discovered that: a) it was uncomfortably snug and b) I have the first inklings of a baby bump. Not big enough to make anyone thing I'm pregnant, but probably big enough to make everyone think I've gained a few pounds. That's what makes me wonder, though... I haven't gained any weight. Yet. My body is just shifting and morphing and making room for you, little bean. It amazes me that such a small little life could change my body so much already.

Tuesday I had my first appointment with my regular ob/gyn. After our last ultrasound with Nurse Practitioner Missy, she told us that she has done her job and it's time to treat this pregnancy like any other. Since the first appointment with the ob/gyn is to "confirm pregnancy" (for them, I guess... I'm already pretty certain you're there, little bean), they performed another ultrasound. You still don't look human, although you are less blob-like than two weeks ago. You are changing so rapidly, soon I won't even be able to call you my little bean.


Love,
Suzanne